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Lesson 2 Change Your Thoughts - Change Your Life
Make Peace With The Past
In order to cleanse your early money memories you must acknowledge, accept and adjust. Here’s an example of what this means. Imagine you were cooking dinner on the stove and got a phone call in the living room and while on the phone heard a loud boom, an explosion in the kitchen. You run back to the kitchen and see a spreading fire but quickly put it out. So what really happened? You went back to the kitchen and 1. Acknowledged, that there was a fire. You, 2. Accepted that there was a fire. This does not mean that you accept it as good or inevitable but you accept that is what it is. In this case you say to yourself “If I don’t put this out it will burn the house down.” Then you 3. Adjusted, in this case you would have put a towel on it, thrown water on it, used a fire extinguisher, called the fire department for help, you would have done what ever it took to take care of the problem.
And so it is with our money memories. 1-2-3 Acknowledge Accept & Adjust
For the memory to be fully healed it must be embraced with forgiveness. It is only through forgiveness that the energy of the memory can be released and let go to takes its proper place in the past. Without forgiveness you are destined to carry the memory and it’s effects with you. If you feel that you can’t forgive, you must forgive. If you feel that judgment and punishment must occur, then it must occur at a higher level. It is your duty to heal yourself. Only by letting go of the pain will you be healed. Forgive so that you may live.
With the power of forgiveness we then, 1-2-3, acknowledge, accept and adjust.
So how would we use this in a practical way?
How would Ann, the girl who lost the money on the way to buy a pie heal her money memory?
1:She would, acknowledge, "When I was a girl I lost the money my mother gave me to buy a pie with."
2:Then, accept, "It was the first time I was trusted with money and I lost it. I disappointed my mother and was embarrassed in front of my family. I had to sit there eating dinner knowing that there would be no desert and that it was my fault. I felt miserable. I may not have understood what impact that incident had on me but I never felt safe around money. The thought of losing it terrified me. I would never even consider any kind of investment, my money and to be safe, in the bank, safe and that’s it."
3:Then she would, adjust. "Now that I’m older I realize I was just a girl. I just lost the money. I was just a kid. It had nothing to do with taking considered risk. It wasn’t a decision I made, it was an accident. Now that I’m an adult I can understand financial risk and make intelligent choices. I can now invest and enjoy having my money make money. To that little girl you’re forgiven, you’re loved we welcome you to the dinner table. I embrace the little girl and allow her to go back and play while I handle my financial affairs like the thoughtful adult I am."
The key to this whole process is the ability to forgive. We must be able to forgive the people involved, including ourselves, forgive the event itself, as it has now taken on a life energy of it’s own and forgive the effects that carrying the event forward into our adulthood has brought us. Forgiveness sets us free.
How would Robert the man who inherited two million dollars because his parents died in a car crash heal his money memory?
1) Acknowledge 2) Accept 3) Adjust
Now that you have your most powerful childhood money memory its time to take a fresh adult look at the situation and forgive yourself and all those involved. Go through the memory see what affect it has had on your adult financial life. Then see yourself as that child and forgive those involved including yourself for bringing this memory along with you into adulthood. Understand that as a responsible adult you can choose to make adult decisions about money and make a firm decision that you will do just that.
Write down your most influential early money memory and what impact it has had on your adult life. Then write down what impact it will continue to have if you do not change your thinking. Now write what alternative healthy thoughts would serve you well as an adult. Write a note explaining to yourself as a child how your money thought was obtained and, if applicable, how it may have been designed to help you as a child. Then let your childhood memory go off to be part of your past.
Write a note to any adult that had been involved in your memory that you now understand that your money memory was designed to protect a child or was an accident, or a result of their situation or understanding of money, as the case may be. Tell them that you now have a healthy adult perspective on the matter and forgive them and or thank them for their part in your memory.
Then write a note to yourself as an adult explaining that you have forgiven yourself as a child and for carrying the memory into your adult life as well as all others involved. Explain how your new healthy though about money will serve you well as an adult and what you expect to happen as a result of your new thinking.
Once a farmer has prepared the soil for planting, it becomes unnecessary to go back over the same ground. Once you have repaired your past thoughts it is not necessary to continue to revisit them. If at some point the future you find yourself stuck, it may be helpful to repeat this process. But for now let the past be in the past as we will now take a look at exactly where you are today
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